Does Lying Have an Impact on Passion? One of my True Stories

Just Tell Me the Truth

I began re-dating after a few years of divorce back in 2005. Dating internationally was a part of my approach this time and I found it exciting, challenging and sexy as well. The ladies I met were quite the attention-getters, arousing and they responded to me in many ways I found satisfying. They weren't just any kind of women. Most were luxurious, smart, very attractive, available and responsive.

I met people in person, on-the-internet, through friends and other avenues. Being overwhelmed with the interest of many women at my age of 57 years old was quite exhilarating and I must say; it was quite flattering. I wasn't necessarily seeking 30 somethings; There were women usually aged 36-47 years old that came my way. And they were serious. I questioned their motives but...that's another story.

At some point though, and I don't remember exactly when it was, patterns began to surface in ladies that I could no longer ignore. I wasn't naive; maybe I just didn't want to believe what I was seeing, hearing and experiencing. In some ways, Maybe I was in denial or just didn't want to believe that some people are just the way they are, because their motives are less than honorable and genuine. In the end(and things aren't over yet)...I have simply had to face things as they are, hold to my standards and boundaries and not feel bad that someone else just did not, could not or would not tell the truth during the relationship journey. Deep within my heart there was often a screaming question: "Why can't you just tell me the truth?"

Everyday we all want that answer to many questions I suppose. After quite a few dates, though...it began to be something I could not ignore any longer. Some women lied about simple things while others portrayed themselves completely different than what their real lives reflected. Holding a straight face and being fully emotive was evidenced in some as well. Some women lied about lying and tried to tell me, I translated their words wrong. Yet, when I intensely questioned the validity of some statements in areas, critical to the on-going life of the relationship, my interests and questions remained ignored or unanswered. Upon second attempts to gain answers, my inquiries still remained unaddressed. Once I was accused of attempting to be a snooping detective and told I should just "trust" and was even given a lecture on the necessity of trust to build a relationship.

Without a doubt; trust is necessary. But..I trust the truth, not lies.Lies rest on sinking sand. Facts are good but even facts change. Truth does not. I believe truth and authenticity along with desire, motivation and willingness to pay the sacrificial price are very basic to begin and maintain a healthy relationship. I haven't compromised my beliefs even though they have been challenged. But..hopefully I've become a little wiser and careful in my selections. Beautiful women are great but...beautiful women with character are better.

David Hammock. Copyright © 2011. All Rights Reserved.